Right as I turned 30, I moved to the Washington, DC area for a new job. I had just gotten out of a serious relationship and was finally moving out of the small town I had grown up in. I was ready to begin a new chapter of my life and eager to embrace a metropolitan lifestyle.
For my apartment search, I made a spreadsheet with my top considerations for my ideal bachelorette pad, including amenities like a pool, gym facilities, balcony, in-unit washer and dryer, and views. I also wanted it to be within a reasonable distance of a metro station.
I found a 1-bedroom, 1-bathroom apartment that had it all, complete with a balcony overlooking the pool with views of Rock Creek Park. My balcony faced east, and I was greeted in the morning with gorgeous sunrises. To me, my place was perfect.
Barely a year later, I would surprise myself by walking away from the apartment that checked all my boxes for something that would have scored very poorly on my spreadsheet.
My time in the single life didn’t last long
After moving to the city, I dove into the dating scene. Much to my surprise, I met a handsome guy who soon became my boyfriend, about a month after I moved into my apartment. His apartment was in DC, less than 10 miles from mine. Before ever going to each other’s places, we talked about our apartments over the phone. I told him about watching the sunrise while I drank coffee on my balcony. “That sounds amazing,” he said, “I have a view of a building, and a tree.”
I mentioned that I had some quirky furniture pieces that were from my grandparents. Prior to moving to DC, my boyfriend had been living in another country and didn’t bring much with him. He described his apartment as “minimalist” and admitted it gave off “American Psycho vibes.” His furniture, he said, had been largely sourced from people in his building who were moving out.
Fusing a bachelorette and a bachelor pad
Not long after we started dating, we were spending time at each other’s places regularly. Within the first year of our relationship, we realized that we had something special and wanted to move in together with the intention of getting married and starting a family. We eventually did both.
The next question became, where should we live? Looking for a 2-bedroom, 2-bathroom place seemed like the obvious choice since we were both working from home due to the pandemic, had future plans to have a baby, and I was apprehensive about sharing a bathroom with a dude.
As we started our search, we quickly realized a 2-bedroom, 2-bathroom apartment with our list of must-haves was almost as expensive, or more expensive, than paying for our two individual apartments. While our motivation for moving in together wasn’t financial, it was hard to stomach the idea of paying more to live together.
I had to compromise a lot
Then my boyfriend suggested something that seemed outlandish. What if I moved into his 1-bedroom, 1-bathroom apartment? He was in a better location, but his place didn’t have a balcony or an in-unit washer-dryer. If we didn’t like it, he was on a month-to-month lease, so we could move somewhere else whenever we wanted.
Five years and one toddler later, we’re still in the same apartment my husband had when we met, but now it’s full of my furniture. In the end, a good location and a flexible layout allowed us to reconfigure a dining area into a work station and later into a nursery.
Sure, I miss having an in-unit washer-dryer, but not enough to consider moving. At least not yet. While a balcony and second bathroom would be nice, it’s not worth the extra $1,700 per month we would pay to have a larger place in our same building.
We’d prefer to use the money we’re saving on housing to put towards our long-term financial goals, going out in the city, or traveling. I’m glad I kept an open mind during our apartment search as a couple. Our living situation might seem unconventional to some, but it’s working for us and allows us to raise our child in a prime city location while still having disposable income for fun activities.
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