This story is based on an interview with Judi Gatson, a local TV evening news anchor from Columbia, South Carolina. It has been edited for length and clarity.
My 82-year-old father has a mind as sharp as it’s always been.
However, his health issues include congestive heart failure, high blood pressure, diabetes, arthritis, and problems with his vision. He has spent long periods in the hospital.
His longtime companion died from a heart condition in 2023. He had been her primary carer, which took its toll both emotionally and financially.
Dad drained his resources
We weren’t aware of it at the time because Dad, a magistrate judge who continues to work part-time in the judicial system, is a very proud man. However, we later found out that he had tapped into his retirement and other savings, ultimately draining all his resources.
My sisters and I weren’t in a position to have him live with us because we were medically unqualified, and our homes weren’t suitable for his needs.
He moved into an assisted living facility where the fees are $5,000 a month. The only resource he had was a $2,200 Social Security check, which covered less than half the cost.
As a result, we joined forces to cover the shortfall, which was a real challenge.
We were lucky because we had a piece of family property in Alabama on my late mother’s side. We sold it for around $50,000, and the money served as a temporary measure to keep Dad where he was.
He feels safe and well cared for
It had taken him a while to adjust. His lack of mobility and some serious issues with his shoulder made it difficult for him to go downstairs to the dining room for meals at first.
Still, he’s happy with the arrangement now. He feels safe and well-cared for. There are doctors and nurses on-site.
One of the best things about the facility is its proximity to my house. It’s a short drive away, and I can visit regularly.
I’m in the sandwich years with teenage sons, and my dad dotes on them. We often join him for lunch, especially in the summer when the kids are out of school.
Read more on our long-term care coverage
We know the money from the property sale will run out soon — possibly as early as the end of the year — and we constantly wonder how we’ll cope.
On balance, other facilities are no cheaper
Of course, there are other assisted living facilities, many on the other side of Columbia that might seem cheaper at first. But they are miles from where we live.
When you factor in community fees and travel costs, they’re pretty much the same, and you only save a couple of hundred dollars a month.
I don’t really want to put Dad through the upheaval of moving for so little savings.
You also hear some horror stories about some of the less expensive places, which might be understaffed and less safe.
However, I’m looking for other options with the assistance of a gerontologist. She’s helping me tap into resources I didn’t know existed before.
I’m a person of faith and constantly tell my boys, “Do your best and trust the Lord for the rest.” Something right for Dad will come along.
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