Growing up, I didn’t view poker as a game for girls.
My dad and brothers constantly played, with the sounds of them placing their bets and shuffling cards always in my periphery. But I was never invited to join them.
One time, they let me join a game of Texas Hold ‘Em without fully explaining the rules, only to raise the bets early and push me out as quickly as possible.
I was frustrated and vowed never to play at another unwelcoming table.
Decades later, when I found out my new job offered a membership to a networking organization that was hosting an all-women poker night with limited seating, I eagerly signed up, even though I only knew the basics of the game.
It felt like a community I wanted to be part of since childhood. Plus, I was curious about whether the game could help me level up my networking abilities.
I needed an outlet to develop a competitive edge in the workplace
When I joined this initial poker night, I was at the midpoint of my advertising career.
I’d spoken on a number of panels and was regularly meeting with a business coach to sharpen my leadership skills. But I still thought I needed to invest more in personal development, which, in turn, could help me at the office.
My coach and I brainstormed innovative ways for me to maintain a competitive edge, but I never expected that playing a card game would help me hone enviable business skills.
I’m already extremely extroverted, so schmoozing has never been a problem for me, but I still thought the poker night would be a great way to expand my reach of connections.
Unfortunately, my poker prowess was limited to passively catching video clips over my boyfriend’s shoulder. However, once I realized how heavily the game skewed male, I was determined to sharpen my skills. Plus, I wondered whether I’d pick up anything useful that could also help me in the corporate world.
The night of the event, the room was alive with energy. The vibe was not at all intimidating, evidenced by wide smiles and warm energy. Every few minutes, a table erupted in cheers.
The instructors made it easy to play, offering tips on how to think about probability and when to raise the pot.
I won several hands while chatting with the other eight women at my table.
When the event came to a close and the venue lights flipped on, no one wanted to leave. Someone shouted, “I’ve finally learned how to bet on myself, don’t make us stop now!”
I love that the game serves as a networking hub to empower others
After that first poker night, a handful of us from the group committed to organizing a monthly game, and we’ve stuck together for over two years.
I’ve felt the impact of regular attendance — it’s improved my betting skills and helped me build long-term relationships. The table has also been a natural place to engage with peers, as we spend hours playing and chatting.
Last month, I hosted 23 women from the group at my office, and the vibes were the antithesis of a smoky casino.
I loved seeing the conference room set up with round tables, rather than the intimidating U-shaped seating it normally features.
The room smelled like Jo Malone and popcorn. The playlist: Chappell Roan and Stevie Nicks. Our poker chips clicked like high heels on marble as I shuffled the deck with one hand and topped off my glass of pinot noir with the other. Being in the office this late was never more fun.
As we moved the dealer button around the table, our conversation was intrinsically empowering.
Someone mentioned they’re interviewing for their next job, and another discussed their recent promotion — all while placing bets and counting chips.
In my experience, poker skills beget business skills
With all this poker experience under my belt, I’ve realized Texas Hold ‘Em is analogous to the business I navigate every day.
Senior advertising executives like me manage large teams and often make decisions under pressure with incomplete information. Poker trains me how to do just that, since I never know what cards my opponents are holding, but I have to check, bet, raise, or fold when it’s my turn anyway.
I’ve considered how the game helps each of us read a room — whether it’s scanning for reactions when players look at their cards or reading faces in the boardroom, the skill is the same.
Overall, this game has made me more confident in my 9-to-5, especially when I have to make unpopular leadership decisions that frankly don’t always work out as expected.
In poker, when I lose a hand, I don’t cower away from betting on the next one. Each hand dealt is a fresh start, like a new day of the workweek.
Additionally, this hobby has allowed me to meet incredible professionals and help them achieve big wins off the felt.
I recently connected with a first-time player who was moving from London to Chicago. She was looking for contract positions, and I gladly introduced her to my human resources lead.
We named our group “She Runs The Table,” an antidote to belittling #GirlMath posts on TikTok, a manicured counterpoint to a culture that sometimes tells us to shrink our bets and smile as we fold.
But at our table, we ante up and continually raise the stakes.
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