Zooey Deschanel, 45, says she’s mindful of how she shows up around her kids.
On Thursday’s episode of “Call Her Daddy,” the “Elf” actor spoke about being bullied as a child and how it shaped her identity and her approach to parenting.
Though she still has moments of insecurity, Deschanel says she doesn’t let her kids see them.
“I have a daughter and a son, and I don’t want them to ever think like, ‘Oh, Mommy’s insecure,’ or, you know, like, ‘My mom doesn’t like…'” Deschanel told host Alex Cooper.
“I always want them to think I’m happy with myself and, like, because they get their self-esteem from their parents, you know. So yeah, it’s important to me to, like, show up with confidence,” she said.
Deschanel shares two children with her ex-husband, Jacob Pechenik. The pair split in 2019 after four years of marriage.
The actor said she’s aware that Hollywood can be brutal to women when it comes to their appearance, but says she tries not to let that kind of commentary affect her.
What’s important is having a strong sense of self, she said.
“My identity was never super wrapped up in my appearance. I always made an effort to be like, what I’m presenting is more about my style and like, artistic and creative expressions versus, ‘Oh, like I’m so just naturally perfect,'” Deschanel said.
“All those things are so ephemeral and, you know, they change, and they’re subjective. And so I think not having my identity so wrapped up in what I looked like when I was 25 is really great,” she said.
Deschanel says she tries to be fully present with her kids whenever she isn’t working, including doing school drop-offs and pickups, taking them to playdates, and attending their extracurricular activities.
When she is working, she focuses on attending the important events.
“I get that sometimes you can’t, but try to get there for like, whatever, the big game or the school play or like those big things, because those are the things they remember a lot,” Deschanel said.
Deschanel joins other celebrities talking about how they try to instill confidence in their kids.
Speaking to People in 2024, Carson Daly said he’s honest about his own struggles with his kids and treats them like adults so they feel safe discussing difficult topics with him.
“I’ve always talked to them like they were 30 years old,” Daly said.
In May, Kate Winslet’s daughter, Mia Threapleton, told Elle that her mother tried to instill body confidence in her from a young age, including when she was insecure about showing her shoulders while swimming.
“My mom said: ‘No, this is strong. So many people would love to be able to swim the length of the pool the way you do — think of it as a positive thing,'” Threapleton said, recalling her mother’s words.
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