This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Kirsten Bradford, a 30-year-old marketing professional based in Dallas, Texas. It’s been edited for length and clarity.
After losing my marketing job in 2023, I had no doubts I’d find a new one. I had just earned my master’s degree and figured it would help me break into new industries. To find out how wrong I was, especially as a single parent, was scary and confusing.
Over the next year, I spent every day at home applying for jobs, only to feel exhausted and unable to do much else. I felt heavy and numb, like nothingness. I didn’t realize how burned out I’d become until my 8-year-old son brought it to my attention.
I looked around at the laundry piled up, the weight I gained, and my dirty room, and realized all the ways my lifestyle was hurting me. I knew I needed to make a change for us.
Since then, I’ve completely changed the way I approach the job hunt, and that discipline is helping me recover from burnout and feel like a human again.
In my first year of unemployment, I spent 4 to 8 hours a day applying for jobs
When I got hired for a marketing role at a tech recruitment firm, a lot of the language they were speaking went right over my head. I decided to pursue a master’s in business management from SMU Cox to close the learning gap at work. When the school program intensified, and I started pulling myself in too many directions, I was let go from work.
I graduated soon after and started applying to banking jobs, hoping to get my foot in the door. When that wasn’t picking up, I figured I’d for sure be able to get a job in marketing given my experience, but nothing came from that either. I just felt so confused. It was scary to go from a full-time salary to nothing, but luckily, my son and I live with my parents rent-free.
In my first year of job searching, I applied to 278 jobs and only landed two interviews. It had me questioning my worth and wondering if something was wrong with me.
It was a really sad time, but I kept pushing through.
My energy was exhausting and my son could feel it
I realized things needed to change when my son, a chronic co-sleeper who is known to tiptoe into my room in the middle of the night, told me, “I don’t want to sleep here anymore, I don’t like the way it feels.”
I knew it was because of me. My energy was exhausting, and he could feel it; no child should bear the weight of their parents’ emotions. That’s when I told myself, “If you’re not going to be happy for you, you need to do it for him.”
We always used to have fun together. We’d go to the park, downtown, anywhere to spend time with each other. I couldn’t remember the last time we went on an adventure. I couldn’t even remember the last time I worked out, cooked a proper meal, or even put on makeup.
I don’t think my son recognized me, and at that moment, I didn’t either, but I wasn’t willing to lose my son over it. My favorite job is being a mom.
I implemented 3 immediate changes in my lifestyle to help with my burnout
The very next thing that I did was pray, and I felt God tell me “stop.” I initially dismissed it, but I realized going at full speed hadn’t gotten me anywhere. It was time to stop and smell the roses, and know that I gave it my best.
The first thing I did to get myself out of my rut was to go on walks, inviting my son along when he was ready. Then, I started cooking and cleaning more. I liked how it felt not being a robot whose only task was to apply to jobs.
The biggest moment of change was when my son and I started going back out again. It was back to the basics. Even if we don’t have money, we’re still going to have a good time. That’s when I started easing back into myself.
I only apply to jobs for 90 minutes a day now
I picked up a part-time job in retail at Bath & Body Works to make some extra money. Additionally, I only give myself 90 minutes a day to apply for jobs, probably a few days a week.
That time usually includes me finding a job I want to apply for, using AI to optimize my résumé, submitting the application, and finding someone to follow up with. I find a lot of jobs from alum groups or referrals. If someone calls me back, great, but if they don’t, it’s OK. I can’t afford to let the job market hurt my spirit anymore.
Outside of that, I follow a schedule. I wake up, take my son to school, work out, cook, and study the Bible or read another book. Right now, I’m challenging myself to read one audiobook and one physical book each week.
My discipline and spirituality are bringing me out of burnout
My spirituality has also kept me grounded during this time, and I keep myself very busy.
I’m currently looking for a hobby that’ll keep me out of survival mode. I’m thinking of getting more into decorating because I get to use my hands, and it keeps my mind solving problems in a creative way. It’s not easy, and it’s not stressful.
I’ve been calling my loved ones more because I have the time, and I’ve been volunteering more. I’ve met good people there, and it makes me happy to serve.
One of the biggest things that’s helping me ease out of burnout is having the discipline to stay busy and keep up with my schedule. No matter what I’m doing in a day, I treat it like it’s my job.
Do you have a story to share about navigating burnout? If so, please reach out to this reporter at tmartinelli@businessinsider.com.
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