At almost 97, my friend Bryan still lives independently and even does his own shopping. Whenever I hang out with him, I’m always blown away by him; he’s such an inspiration to me.
There’s a 57-year age difference between us — I’m 40 and he turns 97 in August — but somehow our friendship just works. We met at a bakery six years ago in Melbourne, Australia, and struck up a conversation. That was the start of a beautiful, enduring friendship.
Bryan has lived an extraordinary life. He has known great love and great loss, with the passing of his wife and son. However, he is still sucking the marrow out of each day, teaching me important lessons along the way.
Bryan values his independence
Bryan is adamant about maintaining his independence and staying in his own home for as long as possible.
In the last few years, his health has deteriorated somewhat. His knee gives him a lot of grief, and recently, he told me he is going blind in one eye.
During our last catch-up, I suggested it might be worthwhile thinking about moving into a retirement village, but he shot the idea down in flames. “Could you imagine me sitting at a dining room table with all those old people trying to make conversation?” he said with a chuckle. “They’d have to drag me out of here kicking and screaming first.”
I think for Bryan, the comfort and familiarity of living in his own home, and the mental stimulation that comes with independent living, are part of the secret to his longevity.
He keeps active in the local community
Bryan can’t walk very well and uses a mobility scooter (he calls it his “limousine”), but that doesn’t stop him from going places. He gets out and about most days, whether it’s to the local bakery to chat to the ladies there, or to the supermarket to do his weekly grocery shopping.
Bryan is one of those people who makes friends wherever he goes, and most people who meet him are captivated by his charm, just as I was.
At Christmas time, there was a hiccup with a package I sent him, and it got stuck in transit at the local post office. When I called and mentioned that I was trying to redirect it to a Mr. Bryan Hipwell, the post office employee responded, “Oh yes, we all know Bryan in here.” I smiled on the other end of the phone line.
He cooks for himself and eats a balanced diet
Bryan receives the government pension and is open about the fact that he doesn’t have a huge amount of cash, but he still eats well. He loves steak and salmon, and once a month, he treats himself to a hearty meal out at the local bistro.
One time when I dropped in, he had something simmering away on the stovetop that smelled amazing. I found my mouth watering and couldn’t help but ask what the smell was. “I’m slow-cooking a casserole,” he said.
Some research has found that cooking has a positive impact on health and contributes to a better quality of life for older people. Again, Bryan has the longevity recipe right.
He doesn’t sweat the small stuff
When Bryan told me about the macular degeneration causing the blindness in his eye and that the treatment entailed having a needle injected into his eyeball, I winced. “Oh, Bryan, that sounds so awful,” I said.
However, he wasn’t concerned. “What good does worrying do for you?” he replied. It wasn’t the first time he’d said that phrase to me.
Over the years, I’ve noticed that Bryan never focuses on the negatives. He is the most optimistic human being I’ve ever met and always finds the silver lining in a situation.
Above all else, I think that’s the secret to Bryan’s success in life, and to his longevity. He maintains a positive outlook despite the odds, and he genuinely believes that things will work out for the best.
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