This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with 75-year-old Laurence Gerowitz, a real estate litigator, about his move into a larger condo in New York City. This conversation has been edited for length and clarity.
I lived on the Upper East Side for most of my adult life: about 48 years, starting in the late 1970s. My wife and I bought into a co-op on 85th Street in 1999 for $265,000 and lived on the third floor of the five-story walk-up.
Our apartment was 1,200 square feet and had a very nice layout, as well as a working fireplace. The building had no amenities whatsoever, but we were still very happy to be there. We lived there for 25 years and essentially raised our son in that apartment.
In 2008, he moved to Villanova, Pennsylvania — near Philadelphia — for college, and over the years it became clear he was never moving back to New York. He’s now married and they live there with their two young children.
New York suits me just fine, but not so much for my son — between the impossible parking and our three-story walk-up, he wasn’t interested.
I understand why. When he used to visit, I’d have to go downstairs to help him haul everything up. We did have two bedrooms, which is a luxury in Manhattan, but there still wasn’t a comfortable place for him and his family to sleep, and I’d end up on a blow-up mattress.
It was just untenable; they didn’t enjoy visiting.
It was time for something new
About two years ago, my wife noticed that a new complex was being built around the corner from us called the Harper. She’s a painter and interior decorator, so she wanted to take a look.
We toured a two-bedroom apartment, which we thought was very nice, but it was also small. Still, we thought the building’s amenities were fantastic. They have a gym, music room, game room, playroom, and creative studio — which we thought would be great for our grandkids.
We sat with the idea for a while. A couple of months later, we went back to see a larger unit — a model of about 1,853 square feet with an 80-square-foot terrace and three bedrooms, one of which could be used as an office.
After that tour, it didn’t take us long to decide to move to the Harper. In the end, it took a couple of months to stage our old co-op, and then a few more months to sell.
We have more space and activities for the kids here
The best things I’ve ever done in my life are being a good father and grandfather. My son texts or calls me at least once a day, and that’s my proudest accomplishment — even more than being admitted to the bar at 48 after going to night school for four years while supporting a family.
A big reason we decided to upsize and buy the condo was that my wife and I love being around my son and his family, and we really wanted to create a place where the kids would want to come visit.
We moved into the Harper in March 2024. It’s just around the corner from our old place. It wasn’t a far move, but we’ve spent decades living on the Upper East Side for a reason — we love the neighborhood.
Our new condo has a really well-thought-out layout. We have three bedrooms, including a home office, and two-and-a-half bathrooms. When you walk in, you can turn left into one wing, down that hall are the primary closet, the primary bedroom and bathroom, and the terrace.
If you go to the right instead, a quick left takes you into the kitchen and great room. Further to the right are the guest bedroom and bathroom, a third bedroom that I use as my office, and a small laundry area.
Besides having a larger apartment and living in a building that actually has an elevator, we’re especially happy about the amenities. It’s such a contrast to our old place, where the only extra space was the boiler room.
Our grandkids especially love the building’s music room. They can bang on the drums, sing into the microphone, and strum a guitar. There’s also a playroom with a ball pit.
In the beginning, whenever the grandkids would come over, they would go down to the ball pit three times a day. In the mornings, I’d have to plead with them to finish their breakfast before heading down to play.
It’s obvious they love visiting our new home. The grandkids talk about it all the time, and it’s cute to see them arrive, dragging their little suitcases, already excited to play.
Our family enjoys visiting, it’s not an obligation
I have very fond memories of our old place — it was the first home I ever bought. But over time, living there became stressful.
I was on the board, constantly worrying about the building — especially whether the boiler would work. It was an older property with no central air, just radiators, so there were always issues with the heat.
Here at the Harper, it’s a completely different experience. Everything works, we have three separate HVAC zones that you can set to the exact degree, and the staff is great. My biggest dilemma now is whether to go to my gym on 91st Street or just head downstairs.
I think upsizing later in life is a good thing if you’re in a position where it makes sense for you.
If it’s within your means to make that choice, do it. You’re not just gaining more physical space; you’re also giving yourself and your family more options.
When my son and his family visit, they have their own rooms and are well taken care of. I think they genuinely enjoy coming now; it no longer feels like an obligation.
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